Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Yamazaki Sagaru's request: Please watch this program in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV.
Yamazaki Sagaru's observation report,
week one of the stakeout mission.
No signs of movement from Odd Jobs today, either.
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
When the vice chief found out that the boss here
was the White Yaksha, a hero of the Joi war,
he decided it was time to seriously keep tabs on him.
But regardless of his past, the boss is now just a moronic bum.
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
I'm hitting up the pachinko parlor.
What does that make me, a guy staking out a bum who's bumming around?
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
We're going for a walk.
As time flows by meaninglessly,
I find myself wondering why I ever became an inspector.
I'm no different from that bar code reader.
Every single day, all we do is take in what's right in front of us.
Our lives pass us by as we spend them doing nothing but observing others.
Huh?
That's funny. It won't scan.
Hey, Manager! Looks like this thing's broken!
This happens even to a machine.
It might not be long before I break down, too.
Excuse me.
Could you let me see that for a second?
Don't worry. It's not broken.
It just has a bit of indigestion from scanning too much anpan.
Cheer up.
Your job isn't just some conveyor belt process.
We're all valuable cogs in this massive wheel known as society,
and each of us is an irreplaceable part of the world.
Oh, it works now. Thank you so much.
No problem. Machines can be sensitive.
There will be both good times and bad,
but please keep working hard at your job, okay?
Okay!
I'll do my best!
An Inspector's Love Begins with an Inspection
Observation report, day ten.
Odd Jobs is the same as ever,
and Tama-san is as lovely as ever, too.
Ever since then, I've been finding my eyes glued to her all the time.
I hated this stakeout mission, but now I can't tear myself away.
Day 12
Day twelve.
No changes in Odd Jobs or Tama-san's beauty today, either.
Ah, Tama-san...
It looks like I've become an inspector of you, and you alone.
Day 15
Day fifteen.
No changes in Tama-san's beauty today, either.
Ah, Tama-san...
I wanna arrest your eyes!
Day 20
Day twenty.
Ah, Tama-san...
Where did you come from? Where are you headed?
Day 25
Day twenty-five.
Ah, Tama-san! Wherefore art thou, Tama-san?
Day 30
Day thirty.
Ah, my T—
...esticles!
Day 35
Day thirty-five.
Tama-san.
Tama-san
Tama-san...
Tama-san!
What the hell is this?!
What's wrong with him?!
He's not doing his job at all!
Halfway through this report, he's observing nothing but Tama-san and his testicles!
Kondo-san...
Maybe we should quit being cops, and start up a prep school for stalkers instead.
Don't put me in the same class as him!
My stalking isn't that psychotic!
This isn't even a stakeout now.
You should put a ban on relationships so our squad stays on their toes.
Why're you trying to ruin my love at the same time?
Deal with this yourself, then.
As fellow stalkers, I'm sure you can understand each other.
H-Hang on, Toshi!
Are you telling me to interfere in his romance?
Not happening!
I mean, he might cast black magic on me!
He'll use the Whack spell!
Hey, Toshi!
Snack Otose
Tama, light up the sign outside.
Sure.
What am I even doing?
I have to talk to her.
I have to tell her that her words gave me strength, and thank her!
But then what?
I don't know anything about her.
No!
I cannot pretend to be a mere spectator any longer!
Oh, welcome.
Is the boss here?
Yes.
Captain Okita?
What's he doing here?
Did he just say "boss"? Is he meeting him?
H-He knows!
He's the last demon on Earth I wanted to know about this!
Now that I'm here, expect smooth sailing.
Wait a sec! What are you trying to pull?!
I've never seen a wink that bloodshot before!
Forget smooth sailing, he's gonna put me on a boat made of tissues!
He's gonna sink me and make me an object of ridicule!
So, what do you want?
I'll cut right to the chase.
Could you let our Yamazaki **** your robot girl over there?
Forget the boat made of tissues, he wrapped a mat around me and dumped me in the ocean!
What? I have no idea what you're talking about.
Y'know, the birds and the bees and all that.
That wasn't his point!
You see, Yamazaki's been rather pent up lately, and it's affecting his work.
Well, yeah, but couldn't you have worded that better?!
So we were hoping to borrow that sex toy of yours.
Who're you calling a sex toy?!
Now, listen, you!
What do you think our girl is?!
A blow-up doll, right?
Someone should blow you a clue!
What do you take us for?!
We'd never hand our poster girl over to the likes of you!
Does this mean Yamazaki-san is interested in Tama-san?
S-Stop that, Shinpachi-kun! You're making me blush!
I brought a copy of his love letter, just in case.
I think you'll understand once you read it.
That's no love letter!
Whoa! What is this?
It's creeping them out!
Hang on, Okita-kun. This...
And now they'll know I was staking them out!
Who's Yamazaki?
That's what you take issue with?!
Is it the guy with the V-shaped hair?
That's the vice chief! How short-lasting an impression did he leave on him?!
The event described here is in my data.
Tama-san! You remember it?
Anpan
He's the guy who destroyed a bar code reader with a ton of anpan, the...
Anpan
enemy of machinekind.
Danger
That's how she remembers me?!
She even called me an enemy!
There you have it.
You heard the lady, so could you please leave?
Now, now. Here me out here.
As you can see in this mob letter...
What's a mob letter?! A letter from an extra in the mob?!
The Shinsengumi have been keeping an eye on you lately,
and Hijikata-san is just waiting for a chance to arrest you.
Bring it on. I'd love to see you try.
Well, I'm sure duking it out with you would be fun,
but I can't stand the thought of things going according to Hijikata-san's plans.
As such, why don't we resolve this issue
by arranging a marriage meeting between Yamazaki and Tama-san?
By becoming relatives, the Shinsengumi and Odd Jobs can come to a settlement,
and you'll be cleared of all suspicion.
I won't allow this!
You can't just rush things along without asking the people involved how they feel.
Right, Tama?
I don't mind.
See—
What?!
I don't mind becoming a tool if it will bring the two groups together.
A machine would love nothing more than to be of use to people.
Wait, this is making me look like the bad guy.
Tama!
Don't be hasty!
Who cares if this moron gets arrested?
Yeah!
We'll never let that plain guy have you!
How low could he get?
That monster.
Scumbag!
I've been reduced to a scumbag!
But, well, if she's okay with it, we can't complain.
As her guardians, I suppose we can at least join you for a nice restaurant meal.
Oh, and you're picking up the tab.
I'm perfectly okay with that.
Even if he screws it up, Yamazaki will owe me for life.
The real scumbags are right here!
Never show your face again, you scoundrel!
And you'd better prepare a feast!
I'd like some high-grade oil, too, please.
Snack Otose
Well, I set the stage.
The rest is up to you.
What are you talking about?!
What has he done?
I've totally become the bad guy here.
She hates me.
But wait...
Maybe I've got no right to complain.
It's not that I remained a spectator because I was an inspector...
I chose to remain one out of my fear of failure.
I need to make my move.
I have to grab hold of my life,
and her heart, with my own hands!
I'll turn this crisis into an opportunity.
It's time for my stakeout to end!
Hello. Quite the auspicious day today...
Uh, I have a question.
What is it?
The Shinsengumi and Odd Jobs Families
Why is this happening?
Beats me.
Don't give me that!
Why do we have to have a marriage meeting with you chumps?
Right back at you.
You're the ones who came with this proposal.
Hey, Sougo! What's the meaning of this?
I thought I told you to deal with Yamazaki's stupid make-believe romance.
Don't ask me.
I was told to make Yamazaki focus on his work,
so I thought he'd settle down if he settled down with a woman.
How did you reach that conclusion?
What's the point of marrying into the house you're staking out?
Calm down, Toshi.
Think of it as an undercover investigation.
If he sneaks into their private lives as an in-law,
it'll be easier to get his hands on intel.
And if it comes down to it, I'll jump into Otae-san's private life and back him up.
What you really want to jump into are her private parts!
What are you grumbling about over there?
Where's the food and drink?
You know, we took time out of our busy schedules to be here
because you begged for our poster girl.
Honey, we can't give our girl away to these rude people, right?
I'm amazed these lowly civil servants had the gall to make a pass at her.
Real funny, coming from people always in the red!
You should be grateful for the chance to have a marriage meeting with civil servants!
Dear, was that slang just now?
It was so crude, I couldn't quite catch it.
Get us an interpreter!
We need someone well-versed in Chinese mafia jargon.
Who're you calling Chinese mafia?!
I knew it. The chaperones are fighting already.
If I leave it to them, this meeting will definitely end in failure.
I'm the only one I can trust.
No matter what,
I must capture Tama-san's heart!
I'm Tama.
Pleased to meet you.
Y-Y-Yamazaki Sagaru here.
P-P-Pleased to meet you, too!
Wow, what a pretty young lady!
You've got one keen eye, Yamazaki.
Incidentally, Chief, have you seen my right eye? I seem to have lost it.
She's our pride and joy, the girl we raised with great care, after all.
That aside, is your Yamazaki-san here yet?
I'm already here.
Excuse me, waiter. Will the food be here soon?
I'm not a waiter!
Oh, so the food was already here.
Dear, here's some Plain Joe Bloodied Saute.
I'm not food, either!
Yamazaki-san, I heard that you're the straight man in the Shinsengumi.
Can't you be a bit louder?
Thirty points.
What are you grading me on, Shinpachi-kun?
Is that all you have?
If it were me, I'd have retorted with, "That's rich, coming from a guy who's
neglecting his straight man routine."
This is what you can expect from a by-the-book public official.
What's with them?
Their hostility is clear as day.
They're totally trying to sabotage me.
I need to get it together.
Damn it. I can't see through all the blood.
Use this, if you'd like.
T-Tama-san!
Are you all right?
Should we call an ambulance?
N-No, I'm fine.
Thank you.
She really is a wonderful person.
She shows kindness, unlike the other Gintama girls.
That's why I fell in—
Shouldn't you have offered a handkerchief and not tissues there?
It would've helped stop the bleeding, too.
That's weird. I heard she was a considerate robot maid, but that was 45 points at best.
Why are you grading things, too?
Our job makes us prone to lots of open wounds.
We need someone capable of dealing with them swiftly and efficiently.
I think there were better options there, like asking a waiter for a first aid kit.
What's with this petty competition?!
Vice Chief, quit treating this like some kind of feud between mother-in-laws!
Excuse me, waiter.
That guy with the V-shaped hair seems to have hit his head.
I told you, I'm not a waiter! And I'm the one with the head injury!
Maybe you should've let Hijikata-san handle that retort.
Quit making things so complicated!
Kill Kill Kill Kill
Hijikata-san, you should've followed that up and made it a double retort.
You're holding us back.
Who are you even grading?!
What are you on about? Do you have a problem with our girl?
What about you? Got a problem with our boy?
There's so much tension in the air.
This is not how marriage meetings are supposed to go!
There, there.
Calm down!
Thank you for waiting.
Oh, the food's here, everyone!
This is my chance. I need to change the topic.
C-Come to think of it, Tama-san, I saw you out shopping before.
Do you cook?
I'm a robot maid, so I can handle most housework.
Is that so? What a capable young lady.
I know, right?
Great. The tide has turned.
Isn't that the least a robot should be capable of?
That's the type that only knows how to make meat and potato stew.
Crap, he butted in.
What do the people of the Shinsengumi normally eat?
We have a mess hall at the station,
but the food isn't very good, so we keep going out to eat ramen.
Oh, boy. There it is.
After this, he's definitely gonna go,
"I wanna eat your cooking, Tama-san."
What? How clichéd!
Like I said, quit making things complicated!
You already used the "complicated" retort earlier.
No vocabulary, then.
How did you read my mind?!
Now we can't use the "I wanna eat your cooking" line.
Oh, well.
Skip a few steps and go with "I wanna eat you" instead.
That's skipping too many steps! What kind of irresponsible advice is that?!
They completely cut off my conversation.
And I'd just found an opening, too.
But that means you have a very unbalanced diet.
If you'd like, please come to our place.
I'll cook for you.
Tama-san!
She brought up the topic herself! She's so considerate!
R-Really?
Yes. I always keep nutrition in mind while cooking,
so I'm sure it'll make you feel better.
Ah, Tama-san!
In this maelstrom of malice, you are my only ray of hope!
Way to go, Yamazaki!
I did it!
My heart is overflowing with so much emotion, I can't eat anything right now.
Then we'll help ourselves.
I was speaking figuratively!
How about it, Tama?
Why not treat them to your cooking right here and now?
What? You can cook right here?
Well, yes.
I've already made preparations for dinner.
I-I'd love to try it!
This is like a dream come true!
I never imagined I'd get to eat Tama-san's cooking so soon!
What will she—
Oh, don't worry.
Our Tama takes ingredients into her body, and cooks internally.
Your worst fears won't come true, so don't worry.
I-It's done.
Help yourselves to some monja.
Monja, huh?
Looks delicious.
It looks better than usual today.
Did you do your best for Yamazaki-san?
Come, now. Stop teasing her, honey.
Feel free to dig in.
O-Okay.
Wait...
Tama-san, is this really monja?
It's monja.
It's monja, huh?
Wait. Is it?
It's monja.
Oh, okay. It's monja.
Is it monja?
Wait, was monja always such a mass of mosaics?
It's monja.
What's wrong?
Do you have an upset stomach?
No, no, no!
I just thought I should etch this sight into my memories.
Hey! I'm gonna end up hurting Tama-san!
Calm down.
Monja always looks kinda weird, anyway.
It's all right.
Tama-san would never do something like that.
But my spatula's not moving!
S-Somebody help!
Hang on a second.
Don't be offering us garbage like this.
Vice Chief!
There's no mayonnaise on it.
That's not the problem!
I know.
I-It'd be a waste to eat this all by myself.
Let's all share—
It's okay. We made our own.
Hey, that's sympathy puke!
Yamazaki-san?
Do you not like it after all?
No, that's not it!
I feel like it's too good for me.
Oh, I know. Can I take it home with me?
I'd like to take my time to relish the taste.
If you like it so much, take this with you, too.
In the end, all of you guys are sympathy puking!
What am I, the guy who has to take out the trash?
Yamazaki-san,
you should've sympathy puked in the middle of your reto—
Okay, that's it! You're totally puking, aren't you?!
I'll go get some fresh air.
Well, we should get out of the way and leave the young 'uns to it.
You decide to do this now?!
You really have done nothing but get in the way!
Tama-san, where are you?
Tama-san!
This is the worst.
Forget capturing her heart. This turned into a disaster.
No, that's not it.
Capture her heart? Marriage meeting?
In truth, none of that even mattered.
All I needed to tell her was that her words back then gave me strength.
And yet, I couldn't tell her something that simple.
Not only that, I even hurt her.
I really am such an idiot!
What are you doing here, Yamazaki-san?
You'll catch a cold.
T-T-Tama-san!
I apologize for leaving such an important event midway through.
I remembered something important,
so I went to procure the ingredients.
Please wait one moment.
H-Hey, Tama-san?
I don't know if it's any good,
but this is what you wanted, right?
Anpan and you really are a good fit.
A guardian protecting our society, unbeknownst to all.
The world may not take note of your efforts,
but please remember that someone, somewhere, is watching you.
Yamazaki-san?
Did I do something wrong again?
Not at all.
Thank you, Tama-san.
I feel a lot better.
Thank goodness.
Shall we head back, then?
Nah.
It's all right.
I got what I came here for.
But what about the relationship between Gintoki-sama and the Shinsengumi?
No need to worry.
Inspector Yamazaki Sagaru will keep an eye on the Shinsengumi for you.
Keep working hard at your job, okay?
Okay!
U-Uh...
I made you some monjayaki in return...
Forget Dates, Remember People You Can Hide Your Porn Mags, But You Can't Hide Your ***
Gin-san!
History lessons!
How to hide your porn mags!
Teach us how!
The next episode is an academic (?) two-parter.
History lessons and how to hide your porn mags.
Watch it, 'cause it will definitely come in handy someday.
...Maybe